03-16-2010, 05:50 AM
“What’s going on here, Herb? I thought they were supposed to meet the Lion last?” an audience member whispered to her husband, much to the annoyance of the surrounding patrons.
“I don’t know, Ethel. I haven’t seen this version before,” Herb whispered back.
“Well I think they aren’t doing it right,” Ethel said.
Herb shot her an annoyed glance out of the corner of his eye before returning his attention to the play at hand.
Behind stage, Ander groaned at Belle’s sudden outburst. Although his antics garnered laughter from the audience, they still needed to keep their task on track, and character derailment detracted from the overall quality of the production. Belle’s role was perhaps the most difficult of all, and he certainly voiced his disapproval, but that didn’t mean he should suddenly pick a fight with Orion and start swearing up and down the stage. At the very least, Cain and Zhu had taken to their roles like fish to water, although in Zhu’s case… it probably wasn’t a good thing. The thief sighed as the lights dimmed, his big entrance scene rapidly approaching. While it gave him a good opportunity to ham it up in front of the audience, he also could no longer direct their actions as effectively from his hiding place amongst the curtains.
As the play transferred scenes, Ander stumbled through the dark, banging his metal-gilded shins amongst various props before he finally found the stump that marked his character’s blocking. He held himself into the best-looking pose he could think of, and the blinding stage lights returned. Dorothy, Toto, Scarecrow, and Lion traipsed out from the opposite end, not having yet “noticed” the Tin Man frozen by the stump. Ander stood at a jaunty, rebel-without-a-cause angle, his fake axe slung nonchalantly over one shoulder. The longer he stood in the position, however, the more he realized just how uncomfortable it was, especially since the tin codpiece on his costume started to pinch in unpleasant areas.
Unfortunately, he had a few more minutes of waiting as the quartet passed along some fake trees, a few faces of extras visible underneath the head holes and brown makeup.
“Oh! Apples!” Mr. Zhu gushed. He reached out to pluck a piece of wax fruit, when the tree suddenly gave him a hearty smack.
“How would you like it if someone came and picked something off of you?” the tree’s actor prompted.
After a few more carefully selected lines, the trees suddenly erupted into an apple-throwing frenzy.
“Hey!” Orion growled. “What’s the meaning of this?!”
The fuzzy-clad saiyan picked up an apple and hurled it with incredibly precise accuracy at one of the “trees,” and the extra let out a startled gasp as he completely toppled over from the force, knocking another of his fellow actors down in the process.
“You will not defeat us in battle, Tree Men!” the saiyan crowed, stooping up to grasp fallen apples.
Somehow, Cain managed to get caught in the crossfire, and like a good character, stumbled clumsily on his flimsy boots, and keeping himself stuffed full of straw.
Belle stood away from the action, and one of the props rolled by his feet. He picked it up and took an experimental bite out of it, then made a face at the waxy, inedible taste and texture and spit it out. He tossed the remainder behind him, not even looking, and it sailed across the stage and accidentally hit Ander in the head. Instead, he joined Orion in the fray, growling like a canine and biting one of the extra’s branches. If he was going to be stuck as a dog, then by goodness, he was going to take every opportunity he could get to act like one.
“Now they’re attacking the trees, Herb!” Ethel whispered amongst the audience. “They’re supposed to run away! Why aren’t they running away?”
“I don’t know,” Herb whispered back, his tone line with repressed irritation. “I told you, I haven’t seen this before.”
Cain and Zhu looked on completely helplessly as they tried to quell their infuriated companion, but eventually all the trees fell down unconscious, and Orion erupted in triumphant laughter. Ander, refusing to break character, hadn’t seen what transpired, although he could take a wild guess. If Orion went this crazy over a couple of scrawny guys dressed up as trees who were only supposed to throw apples at them, he couldn’t imagine what would happen during the scenes where the flying monkeys and Winkies attacked. At this point, however, all he cared about was them hurrying over so he could move and alleviate the painful pinching.
“Let’s go this way!” Cain prompted, all too obviously.
Together, they traipsed along until they finally “noticed” the desert dweller.
“Silver Man!” Orion cried out, stepping over Zhu’s line. Fortunately, the eunuch recovered gracefully.
“A man! A man made out of tin!” the cross-dresser bubbled in over-the-top surprise.
Dorothy stepped over and inspected him, banging on the tin to emphasize the verbal observation. Ander did his very best to keep his smile, but the banging didn’t exactly help his costume from riding up. In fact, it made it a little worse. Fortunately, his first line occurred right about now. He spoke through gritted teeth, purposefully obscuring the words.
Zhu gasped, a little too hammy. “He can talk? What’s he saying?”
Orion trained his ear. “‘Spoil Dan?’ Who’s Dan? Is this the wizard we are looking for? Why must we spoil him?”
Ander repeated his line, his patience thinning. He needed circulation, sweet circulation.
“‘Loyal tan?’” Orion guessed again, completely confused.
Ander said it once more, a little louder, but still without opening his jaw.
“‘Royal ban?’ Speak up Silver Man, we can’t hear you!”
“OIL CAN!” Ander shouted.
A pause ensued, all slightly taken aback. Zhu recovered first.
“He said ‘oil can,’” the eunuch clarified unnecessarily.
Cain located the prop, and squirted some blue food-colored water onto the joints of Ander’s costume whilst Zhu shook his limbs. Belle looked on, self-segregating from the big pussy and the cross-dresser. If the half-saiyan recalled correctly, dogs liked to pee on shiny metal objects…
“Oh god that feels better!” Ander breathed in relief, adjusting the tin plates. He cleared his throat, and then resumed a charming demeanor. “Thank you so much. A while back, I was chopping a tree, and then it began to rain. In the middle of my chopping, I rusted solid, and I’ve been that way ever since.”
“Our pleasure!” Cain beamed.
“We’re on our way to see the wizard! I’m looking for a way back home!” Zhu announced in perfect falsetto.
“And me a brain,” the Scarecrow added.
“And me… I… have worms…” Orion pitched in glumly.
“Woof,” Belle concluded, albeit a little bitterly.
“Do you think if I went with you, this Wizard would give me a heart?” Ander asked. He banged demonstratively in his chestplate, eliciting a hollow echo. “I don’t have one. All hollow.”
The thief couldn’t help but think the irony of the statement.
“Why, sure!” Zhu agreed happily.
Dutifully, Ander broke out into an enthusiastic segment of “If I Only Had A Heart,” completely oozing charisma and manly charm, or at least, so he tried. One could only be so manly singing in a costume of tin about feelings and sentimentality and being friends with Cupid. Once he finished, he took a grandiose bow.
“Can we move on yet?” Belle asked.
“Oh, cute little dog,” Ander improvised, leaning casually on his axe. “But maybe it needs a little obedience training.” He emphasized the final two words, but Belle didn’t really take the hint.
“We can’t finish if everyone is stopping to sing songs,” the faux puppy pointed out.
Ander gestured grandly to the end of the sage. “Lead the way, Toto. It’s going to be a long road.”
Unfortunately, at that moment, a puff of red smoke plumed out from the behind them, another actor rising onto the stage from a hidden platform beneath. A woman in green makeup and an iconic black dress, cape, and pointed hat stepped out, cackling maniacally. Ander, Mr. Zhu, and Cain turned, expressing the appropriate terror at the first appearance of the Wicked Witch of the West, while Orion looked on, completely bemused. Belle, however, dropped into a guarded stance.
“You call that long? Why you’ve just begun!” the witch laughed. “Escorting her to the wizard are you, my fine gentlemen? Well stay away from her! Or I’ll stuff a mattress with you, and you, I’ll turn you into a beehive!” Then she stopped, realizing the Lion was there where he wasn’t supposed to be. She quickly improvised. “And as for that mangy feline, I’ll… skin you and turn you into a rug!”
“Is that the wizard?” Orion asked.
Cain shook his head and whispered discreetly back. “That’s the Wicked Witch of the West. She’s the villainess in the play.”
More red smoke appeared, this time accompanied by a shower of yellow sparks and theatrical pyrokinetics. “I’ll get you my pretty!”
Mr. Zhu placed the back of his hand to his forehead and pretended to swoon, forcing Ander to awkwardly catch him. Then the witch turned viciously to Belle, who looked positively peaked with adrenaline.
“And your little dog too!”
Maybe the half saiyan had forgotten it was just a play. Or maybe some latent repressed memory floated to the surface of his brain, blocking out anything else but instinctual reaction. Whatever the reason, the rest of the cast stared in shock as Belle’s furry-clad body ignited into a fierce aura. The audience reacted much the same, completely stunned.
“MENSTU RATION! YOU’VE SHOWN YOURSELF AT LAST!” Belle howled. With a roar, he leapt forward and plowed his fist into the actress portraying the Wicked Witch. She let out a mangled cry, and then bodily flew across the stage. A loud crash erupted from somewhere offstage, and Dorothy, Scarecrow, and Tin Man winced.
Cain quickly attempted to salvage the scene. “Oh look, the Witch has returned to her castle! We are saved for now! Thank you, Toto, you are so brave!”
Ander looked skyward. Somebody save me from this.
He helped Zhu up, and stuck out an elbow, able to do nothing more than carry on with the production. “To Oz?” he smiled forcibly. Dorothy took his arm, and linked elbows with Scarecrow as well. Cowardly Lion refused. Together, they broke out into a reprise of “We’re Off to See The Wizard,” traipsing along stage until the set around them changed theatrically to that of the gates of the Emerald City.
“And what was that that just happened?” Ethel demanded. “What in the world is going on here?”
“Honey,” Herb said, his irritation growing. “I’m seeing this for the first time, just like you.”
“Who are these actors? Do you know anything about them? Is this some kind of new version of ‘The Wizard of Oz’? How come we didn’t see the munchkins? Why can the dog talk?”
She assailed him with question after question, and finally he snapped.
“I don’t know! Just shut up and watch the play!”
She looked at him, clearly offended, and folded her arms crossly over her chest as she sunk further into her chair, sulking. Herb knew he wasn’t going to get any tonight, but anything to stop her incessant yapping. He hated people that talked during plays.
“I don’t know, Ethel. I haven’t seen this version before,” Herb whispered back.
“Well I think they aren’t doing it right,” Ethel said.
Herb shot her an annoyed glance out of the corner of his eye before returning his attention to the play at hand.
Behind stage, Ander groaned at Belle’s sudden outburst. Although his antics garnered laughter from the audience, they still needed to keep their task on track, and character derailment detracted from the overall quality of the production. Belle’s role was perhaps the most difficult of all, and he certainly voiced his disapproval, but that didn’t mean he should suddenly pick a fight with Orion and start swearing up and down the stage. At the very least, Cain and Zhu had taken to their roles like fish to water, although in Zhu’s case… it probably wasn’t a good thing. The thief sighed as the lights dimmed, his big entrance scene rapidly approaching. While it gave him a good opportunity to ham it up in front of the audience, he also could no longer direct their actions as effectively from his hiding place amongst the curtains.
As the play transferred scenes, Ander stumbled through the dark, banging his metal-gilded shins amongst various props before he finally found the stump that marked his character’s blocking. He held himself into the best-looking pose he could think of, and the blinding stage lights returned. Dorothy, Toto, Scarecrow, and Lion traipsed out from the opposite end, not having yet “noticed” the Tin Man frozen by the stump. Ander stood at a jaunty, rebel-without-a-cause angle, his fake axe slung nonchalantly over one shoulder. The longer he stood in the position, however, the more he realized just how uncomfortable it was, especially since the tin codpiece on his costume started to pinch in unpleasant areas.
Unfortunately, he had a few more minutes of waiting as the quartet passed along some fake trees, a few faces of extras visible underneath the head holes and brown makeup.
“Oh! Apples!” Mr. Zhu gushed. He reached out to pluck a piece of wax fruit, when the tree suddenly gave him a hearty smack.
“How would you like it if someone came and picked something off of you?” the tree’s actor prompted.
After a few more carefully selected lines, the trees suddenly erupted into an apple-throwing frenzy.
“Hey!” Orion growled. “What’s the meaning of this?!”
The fuzzy-clad saiyan picked up an apple and hurled it with incredibly precise accuracy at one of the “trees,” and the extra let out a startled gasp as he completely toppled over from the force, knocking another of his fellow actors down in the process.
“You will not defeat us in battle, Tree Men!” the saiyan crowed, stooping up to grasp fallen apples.
Somehow, Cain managed to get caught in the crossfire, and like a good character, stumbled clumsily on his flimsy boots, and keeping himself stuffed full of straw.
Belle stood away from the action, and one of the props rolled by his feet. He picked it up and took an experimental bite out of it, then made a face at the waxy, inedible taste and texture and spit it out. He tossed the remainder behind him, not even looking, and it sailed across the stage and accidentally hit Ander in the head. Instead, he joined Orion in the fray, growling like a canine and biting one of the extra’s branches. If he was going to be stuck as a dog, then by goodness, he was going to take every opportunity he could get to act like one.
“Now they’re attacking the trees, Herb!” Ethel whispered amongst the audience. “They’re supposed to run away! Why aren’t they running away?”
“I don’t know,” Herb whispered back, his tone line with repressed irritation. “I told you, I haven’t seen this before.”
Cain and Zhu looked on completely helplessly as they tried to quell their infuriated companion, but eventually all the trees fell down unconscious, and Orion erupted in triumphant laughter. Ander, refusing to break character, hadn’t seen what transpired, although he could take a wild guess. If Orion went this crazy over a couple of scrawny guys dressed up as trees who were only supposed to throw apples at them, he couldn’t imagine what would happen during the scenes where the flying monkeys and Winkies attacked. At this point, however, all he cared about was them hurrying over so he could move and alleviate the painful pinching.
“Let’s go this way!” Cain prompted, all too obviously.
Together, they traipsed along until they finally “noticed” the desert dweller.
“Silver Man!” Orion cried out, stepping over Zhu’s line. Fortunately, the eunuch recovered gracefully.
“A man! A man made out of tin!” the cross-dresser bubbled in over-the-top surprise.
Dorothy stepped over and inspected him, banging on the tin to emphasize the verbal observation. Ander did his very best to keep his smile, but the banging didn’t exactly help his costume from riding up. In fact, it made it a little worse. Fortunately, his first line occurred right about now. He spoke through gritted teeth, purposefully obscuring the words.
Zhu gasped, a little too hammy. “He can talk? What’s he saying?”
Orion trained his ear. “‘Spoil Dan?’ Who’s Dan? Is this the wizard we are looking for? Why must we spoil him?”
Ander repeated his line, his patience thinning. He needed circulation, sweet circulation.
“‘Loyal tan?’” Orion guessed again, completely confused.
Ander said it once more, a little louder, but still without opening his jaw.
“‘Royal ban?’ Speak up Silver Man, we can’t hear you!”
“OIL CAN!” Ander shouted.
A pause ensued, all slightly taken aback. Zhu recovered first.
“He said ‘oil can,’” the eunuch clarified unnecessarily.
Cain located the prop, and squirted some blue food-colored water onto the joints of Ander’s costume whilst Zhu shook his limbs. Belle looked on, self-segregating from the big pussy and the cross-dresser. If the half-saiyan recalled correctly, dogs liked to pee on shiny metal objects…
“Oh god that feels better!” Ander breathed in relief, adjusting the tin plates. He cleared his throat, and then resumed a charming demeanor. “Thank you so much. A while back, I was chopping a tree, and then it began to rain. In the middle of my chopping, I rusted solid, and I’ve been that way ever since.”
“Our pleasure!” Cain beamed.
“We’re on our way to see the wizard! I’m looking for a way back home!” Zhu announced in perfect falsetto.
“And me a brain,” the Scarecrow added.
“And me… I… have worms…” Orion pitched in glumly.
“Woof,” Belle concluded, albeit a little bitterly.
“Do you think if I went with you, this Wizard would give me a heart?” Ander asked. He banged demonstratively in his chestplate, eliciting a hollow echo. “I don’t have one. All hollow.”
The thief couldn’t help but think the irony of the statement.
“Why, sure!” Zhu agreed happily.
Dutifully, Ander broke out into an enthusiastic segment of “If I Only Had A Heart,” completely oozing charisma and manly charm, or at least, so he tried. One could only be so manly singing in a costume of tin about feelings and sentimentality and being friends with Cupid. Once he finished, he took a grandiose bow.
“Can we move on yet?” Belle asked.
“Oh, cute little dog,” Ander improvised, leaning casually on his axe. “But maybe it needs a little obedience training.” He emphasized the final two words, but Belle didn’t really take the hint.
“We can’t finish if everyone is stopping to sing songs,” the faux puppy pointed out.
Ander gestured grandly to the end of the sage. “Lead the way, Toto. It’s going to be a long road.”
Unfortunately, at that moment, a puff of red smoke plumed out from the behind them, another actor rising onto the stage from a hidden platform beneath. A woman in green makeup and an iconic black dress, cape, and pointed hat stepped out, cackling maniacally. Ander, Mr. Zhu, and Cain turned, expressing the appropriate terror at the first appearance of the Wicked Witch of the West, while Orion looked on, completely bemused. Belle, however, dropped into a guarded stance.
“You call that long? Why you’ve just begun!” the witch laughed. “Escorting her to the wizard are you, my fine gentlemen? Well stay away from her! Or I’ll stuff a mattress with you, and you, I’ll turn you into a beehive!” Then she stopped, realizing the Lion was there where he wasn’t supposed to be. She quickly improvised. “And as for that mangy feline, I’ll… skin you and turn you into a rug!”
“Is that the wizard?” Orion asked.
Cain shook his head and whispered discreetly back. “That’s the Wicked Witch of the West. She’s the villainess in the play.”
More red smoke appeared, this time accompanied by a shower of yellow sparks and theatrical pyrokinetics. “I’ll get you my pretty!”
Mr. Zhu placed the back of his hand to his forehead and pretended to swoon, forcing Ander to awkwardly catch him. Then the witch turned viciously to Belle, who looked positively peaked with adrenaline.
“And your little dog too!”
Maybe the half saiyan had forgotten it was just a play. Or maybe some latent repressed memory floated to the surface of his brain, blocking out anything else but instinctual reaction. Whatever the reason, the rest of the cast stared in shock as Belle’s furry-clad body ignited into a fierce aura. The audience reacted much the same, completely stunned.
“MENSTU RATION! YOU’VE SHOWN YOURSELF AT LAST!” Belle howled. With a roar, he leapt forward and plowed his fist into the actress portraying the Wicked Witch. She let out a mangled cry, and then bodily flew across the stage. A loud crash erupted from somewhere offstage, and Dorothy, Scarecrow, and Tin Man winced.
Cain quickly attempted to salvage the scene. “Oh look, the Witch has returned to her castle! We are saved for now! Thank you, Toto, you are so brave!”
Ander looked skyward. Somebody save me from this.
He helped Zhu up, and stuck out an elbow, able to do nothing more than carry on with the production. “To Oz?” he smiled forcibly. Dorothy took his arm, and linked elbows with Scarecrow as well. Cowardly Lion refused. Together, they broke out into a reprise of “We’re Off to See The Wizard,” traipsing along stage until the set around them changed theatrically to that of the gates of the Emerald City.
“And what was that that just happened?” Ethel demanded. “What in the world is going on here?”
“Honey,” Herb said, his irritation growing. “I’m seeing this for the first time, just like you.”
“Who are these actors? Do you know anything about them? Is this some kind of new version of ‘The Wizard of Oz’? How come we didn’t see the munchkins? Why can the dog talk?”
She assailed him with question after question, and finally he snapped.
“I don’t know! Just shut up and watch the play!”
She looked at him, clearly offended, and folded her arms crossly over her chest as she sunk further into her chair, sulking. Herb knew he wasn’t going to get any tonight, but anything to stop her incessant yapping. He hated people that talked during plays.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
_=So wake me when it's through
I don't want to feel the things that you do
Don't worry, I'll be fine
I just don't want this dream, wake me up inside=_
I don't want to feel the things that you do
Don't worry, I'll be fine
I just don't want this dream, wake me up inside=_