The Carnival

[Victoria]

Tears fell from her eyelids, dribbling down her cheeks and falling carelessly onto her arm. She sniffled, and rubbed her nose with the back of her hand. More delicate tears joined the wet trail on her face, large drops that splattered upon contact of her hand. She placed her hands on her face and silently sobbed into them, despite the cheerful cries of happiness around her, she let out the sadness she had forbidden herself to embrace only hours before. Victoria lowered her hands, took in a shuddering breath, and pulled out her phone.

The photo album was open, and the first picture remained illuminated upon the screen. It was the woman from earlier, Sophia, dancing in the bright lights. She snapped the phone shut and held it tightly in her hand. With her other hand she began to rub the tears from her eyes. She looked up towards the black sky, and took in a deep breath. “The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.” She recalled the quote under her breathe, wishing that the sky were not so ominous, but knowing that something would have to give. She wiped her nose again and closed her eyes. "I just wish I had gotten to know him better."

The last moments of the event congealed into one, it had all happened so fast. She thought she had been done for, in all reality, Alexander had been the most compatible with her thus far. Competent gunslingers were hard to come by, and he had been taken out right before her eyes. She couldn’t forget the look on his face as the bullet tore through his chest. The crimson blood was etched into her memories, and it made her sick. It wasn’t just for him that she cried it was for everything.

“I want to go home,” she whispered and slid her phone back into her pocket, “but I can’t give up, not now.” Her fingers formed a fist, and she clenched it tightly. “I have to do better,” she looked down at the ground below her, “the first step is always the hardest.” She released her fist and gripped the edge of the roof she had been sitting on. The rides around her made their noises, the people made their movements, and she watched the world around her for that moment. “If I sulk now, I won’t be able to finish this, so I need to straighten the fuck up.”

The ground rushed towards her and she hit the dusty path in a crouch. She stood up and pushed her coral hair out of her eyes. Her event was over and she was still here, it was good news, despite her companions fall. She couldn’t know for sure if he was dead, or alive, but all she could do was push forward. “Right, I won’t give up!” She reaffirmed and stepped into the throng of people and lights.

First step done, second step…I need to see who’s left. She looked around as she walked, her eyes roaming the grounds for anyone familiar or that stood out. She had made friends here, one of the good things that had been produced from Kill Town. Piper, Alura, Orion, Ander, and Sophia, she hardened her gaze, I won’t stop until I have my fist smashing into his face. She pounded her fist into her palm and continued walking.