The Like/Hate Thread

[Jonathan Meer]

Yeah, he and my grandmother are (I would guess) in their mid to late 60s. They had my mom young and my mom had me at 19, so they've teased me about wanting their great grandbabies for a while now (as I'm 27 and have no impending doo- children on the way). Thankfully, my younger sister is pregnant right now but I've been raging a bit because she is still heavily smoking while pregnant, pulling that "I switched to lights so its ok" bullshit on me.

Anyway, its frustrating because they are fairly young, all things considered, and both are very young in personality (in that "not frail and decrepit" sorta way). That said, in the last couple of years, their health has just suddenly and greatly deteriorated. This is also happening with another grandmother of mine, but with her, she was doing great until her husband died and she tried to commit suicide. After being stopped, she has straight up just withered away from being strongly independent to, in the spans of a single year (from the time of this happening, not recently), being the epitome of "little old lady" sitting in her chair and not moving much. With her, I can see why her body just suddenly started withering away, given that she has lost all desire to live.

With the two grandparents in question, however, this is absolutely not the case. Its one hundred percent just a case of two individuals that are very much wanting to continue living and doing everything they can for their loved ones having to deal with their own bodies just turning on them, breaking down and making them go through the ordeal of knowing what will be coming soon and making them worry every single night when they sleep that they (or their other) will suddenly, without warning, stop breathing in the night and just die.

Its never easy, its always frustrating, and when it comes to these two, I'm absolutely not ready. That said, no one ever is, and "being ready" is not a right that we mortals have. It is a defining characteristic of "being mortal".

This post rings true.