The Like/Hate Thread

[Ashe]

Makes me feel strange as no adjustments to the system at this point will or will not direct me to roleplay (or not roleplay). I haven't spent my XP yet (any of it, other than the power up for story reasons) specifically due to it not fitting right for my character's story just yet. I've considered wanting to write some more for her even recently, but life is not giving me that right now. If I do write, it will be because I found the time and motivation to do so. I want to spend the xp and develop her, but I'm not concerned in any way with Combat Level. I haven't stopped writing due to others being seen as too strong to bother trying because I know that, with current perspectives being what they are, that list is entirely meaningless for anything beyond a way to accurately describe the difficulty your character has while fighting someone, even if the end result is a triumphant slaughter. I don't really believe there is any true fix to any of it other than having a new generation of writers join that don't feel uncomfortable with the status quo of the veterans, which is a very common issue that message boards deal with as older users gain more and more popularity within the community. Newer members can frequently feel alienated and simply choose to go somewhere else that is a bit newer out of fear of "competing with the in-crowd" or to avoid site hazing and being told "get thicker skin" when complaining. What stops me from writing is me not doing so. If I have a problem with the mechanics of CDBZ, then there is always Anyria. If I dislike elements of it too, then there is always the option of me asking for Administrative permission to run my own RPG hub within the site using all the elements that I think will be amazing and then seeing how that turns out. There is even the option to write on another site with an entire new group of people, which I also do not do anymore (when I previously had been active on around 5-7 sites during High School, though I can't remember them all). All of these options are great and offer lots of creative freedom for me (ideas I've entertained for a while, even years) but ultimately have failed to deliver on.

A lot of it is likely due to dedicating a large portion of my time for many years to writing for these things and now choosing intentionally to dedicate that time to other options that I sacrificed on for the sake of doing so. I've done the exact same thing with regards to WoW as well (in that I've tried to catch up on all kinds of other games with that free time that I never played due to spending my time on WoW). When faced with the decision of "Sacrifice these new directions of life to return to the website focused writing life, or experience all these new things while pushing to improve my life and try to create a family and relocate", I've chosen the latter as a personal choice while fondly reflecting on (and occasionally revisiting) the former (to note the roleplay I made randomly maybe a year ago closing up that loose end with Sage -the character-).