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+--- Forum: Joining Board (http://alex.zulenka.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=159)
+--- Thread: Karachi (/showthread.php?tid=15881)
Karachi - Karachi - 07-01-2010
Name:Karachi
Race: Saiyan
Sex: Male
Starting Planet: Vegeta
Profession: Martial Arts Instructor
Fighting Style: Overly aggressvive but still takes time to stratigize
Short Bio: Some say he is a descentent from the lineage of Vegeta but this is yet to be proven.
General Description: About 6'0 tall. Karachi has a smybol on his left cheek that represents a lighting bolt. Hes not bulked up but you can tell he has done some training. Hair is like Trunks but his face is more like a mix between Vegeta and Yamacha.
Starting Abilities: Not hit my simple Kai blasts, Sprirt Bang
Trait: More of a bully than a nice guy, but if hes on your side hes not half bad to be around.
Role-play Sample: Karachi glances around on his this new strange world. Blue grass and tall skinny trees...what word is this, he thinks to himself. "Hello?" Karachi calls out in a cry. Almost out of thin air a green Namekian appeared,"Agghhhh," Karachi screams, as he suddenly wakes up in his bed. It has been 10 years since he arrived on this strange planet. He had arrived here as a mere child abandoned by his family and his race. He must now make a name for himself in this strange world doing whatever he can to prove them wrong. " I will relinquish all who betray me and whoever gets in my way shall be forever tomented," Karachi smiles. He simply dashs up into the sky and starts to fly into the morning horizon.
(i think this is 300 characters let me know!)
Karachi - Orion - 07-01-2010
Hi Karachi, thanks for the joining application.
There are a few things I'll need you to fix up before we can accept you.
The two starting abilities you listed are not from the list. Pick two from this list.
Your trait is also multiple choice. From this list here, pick a trait that is suitable for your character.
The sample roleplay is three hundred words, not characters.
We don't allow characters to be biologically linked to any canons, so where you've said that he might be part of the Vegeta-sei bloodline, it will have to only be rumour.
Last but not least, we generally write in the format of past tense. It's only a small thing. For instance, in your first paragraph "Karachi glances around on his this new strange world," it would read "Karachi glanced around on this new strange world."
Fix those little things up and I'll be happy to welcome you to Chubbs.
Karachi - Karachi - 07-01-2010
ok thanks ill be sure to do that