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+--- Thread: C&C on the fight so far (/showthread.php?tid=6107)
C&C on the fight so far - Super Buu - 12-05-2005
You can see how I did the same technique as Kid here in my spar with Bebi.
Quote:Originally posted by Super Buu
Buu's regeneration seemed slower, more grinding, this time. His relentless attacks had begun to catch up to him, and it showed. As new material came up from his neck to form a head, his arms hung below him, not up in a defense as they should be. His knees were bent, seeming to shake under the trembling weight of the regenerating body.
To me, beating a regenerator is about draining his energy. I always roleplay regenerating as draining on your ki, and the more you use it the more open your defense is.
Personally I prefer to integrate thought and opinions into the text, without switching to a first person narrative like KB does. An example from my spar with the preceding Nail;
Quote:Originally posted by Super Buu
A white flash appeared before Buu's face, but he couldn't move. Time seemed to slow down to the pink monster as the blinding white dazzled his shocked eyes. His mind was in a state of disbelief. This could not be happening. It was not happening. Yet as time ticked forward in milliseconds, Buu could see the yellow blast forming in front of him. He knew it was coming, but he couldn't stop it. His shocked mind just stared foward at the light. He was the strongest. There was no way, no way. But... Didn't he want this? If he was the strongest, what was the point of getting stronger? It suddenly made sense. This was a reason. A purpose.
Initially in spars you try to keep the action up, to prevent it from becoming 'boring'. But eventually you just want it to slow down a bit. A slightly better example IMO, though not from a spar;
Quote:Originally posted by Super Buu
Putting the packet of flying saucer candy back on the shelf, the pink Bio-Puttalin leant backwards against the counter and began to mull things over in his mind. What he was seeing in his memory was a completely different Buu. Or at least, different Buus. This time, he had spoken in the flashback - albeit, with the vocabulary of a young child. The younger Buu seemed so different compared to what he was now. Physically, of course, he had not changed at all, but he could not imagine having actually been that innocent and passive. It was almost embarrassing remembering it. He sighed, cracking open another can of cola and grabbing a donut from the food pile.
That's just referring to a younger SB by the way
Reflections like this make a good break from the relentless nature of DBZ roleplays. Speech is definitely a necessity in spars/fights, IMO. Or at least, some kind of non-verbal interaction like nods and such, if your character is the quiet type. It shows how each character regards the other, how seriously they're taking this fight and how much they know. It's pretty important for developing the spar, because if this is the first time your character has met the other, their opinion is probably going to change as the spar goes on. For example, in my spar with Bebi, initially Bebi considered SB as an annoyance. However, he came to realise just how much Buu would go through to win, and had to take the fight seriously in order to take him down.
Another thing, using the same word more than once in a short space of time looks a little clumsy in professional writing. I looked at;
Quote:Originally posted by Nail
The creature quickly turned around and laughed at his opponent and taunted him with a very familiar finger motion which really pissed Nail off. Nail?s arm launched forward at the pink creature who quickly evaded the blow but then Nail whipped around doing the same with his leg striking the pink blob straight in the cheek forcing his head to spin around.
Look at how many times the word 'Nail' crops up
You should try replacing it with things like 'the emerald fighter', 'the Namekian', 'the green figure', etc. Look at Piccolo Daimaou's stuff for examples.
C&C on the fight so far - Hellfighter 17 - 12-08-2005
</3
Good fight, both of you, but Kid Buu is just higher on the notch, sorry.
C&C on the fight so far - Hellfighter 17 - 12-08-2005
Quote:Originally posted by NailSorry. <.<
Quote:Originally posted by HellFighter 17
</3
Good fight, both of you, but Kid Buu is just higher on the notch, sorry.
alright. im guessing that means I lose >.>
Drats, well I guess its back to training if I can rea that after I decide to post one, or am I dead?
EDIT: Or the post that Kid Buu posted. =/
C&C on the fight so far - Hellfighter 17 - 12-08-2005
Lord Yemma Dio, like form the show. You jsut post it in the Next Dimension forum.
EDIT: Beat you by a few seconds. >=P