[C&C] Abby

[Katelyn Ross]

Thought I'd make myself one of these nifty threads. Looking for some C&C, and I will return the favor. =]

— Currently Running Thread: "Pygmalion"

Made my first post here, in the thread above, "Pygmalion." Attempting to introduce Abby's character, first by establishing her staple abilities. The plot will pick up soon, but the first couple of posts are going to be intro, mostly.

[Ashe]

I have to say that I found your character concept to be quite similar to my own. I am looking forward to seeing another "normal girl" character around, though I'm sure well have drastic differences in characters as well.

[Katelyn Ross]

Haha! I do love Ashe, but I'm sure she's much more epicly awesome than Abby. All the same, thanks much for the tibit of C&C =] I'll return the favor in some form or fashion eventually.

Edit — In other news, if I can once again direct you all to "Pygmalion," my second post is up. Please read and review, and I'll love you forever!

Edit 2 — Post 3 of "Pygmalion" is up! Please read and review, I'll return the favor!

Edit 3 — I just posted Post 4 of "Pygmalion."

[Jesper]

I've actually read your thread up to this point, so I might as well give some quick feedback.

You've got some solid writing skill, and your narrative is pretty well-crafted. Your grammar is pretty spot-on too. I mean, there are probably some mistakes there, but nothing that that was so glaring that I needed to comment on it. You did pretty well in your description and imagery, especially concerning your character and her evaluation of her new powers. It's a examination of earth control that we rarely see, and I'm glad you at least took this amount of time in laying it out for your reader.

As far as plot goes, it's nothing that hasn't been done before, but that's not so bad as long as you do a good job in describing it, as you seem to be doing in this thread. But I mean...the main character doesn't remember some things, is being trained in some art by some older sensei type, and said main character has to watch the sensei fight and ultimately lose. If anyone's played Shining Force for Sega Genesis, for instance, they've seen this story.

Still, it's a great way to introduce your character and story, so you seem to have something good going here. I'm sure you wanted more, but that's about all I have at this point. xD

Feel free to take a look at my stuff if you want to return the favor. =]