Wrestling

[Ash]

Ash: Don't worry about the wrestling thing. Its the subject of a joke here, those darned kids on the internet being wrestlers and such (again, past history joke).

I can't stand when you can blatantly see them drawing the razor across their forehead for the blood, and then stand up and "zomg" there's this clean line that starts gushing blood. Michaels is pretty bad about getting caught there.

On the other hand, I wouldn't say all matches are exactly scripted in terms of a screenacting. Its more of "when I move, you move" just like that. They know where they need to go with it, probably have a few things planned as far as executions, but its not "make sure you get four slaps in, not three". They do improv a lot of stuff, which is where their skill as an entertainer steps in (and getting the crowd riled up). In fact, a lot of wrestlers use their long hair to let them kinda talk their way through it with the other guy, so when it looks like they are grunting and talking shit but you can't really tell what they are saying, they are probably like "lol hey gai, you wanna take a Pedigree?" "lol no wai! ok!"

Which is another annoyance: Everytime someone gets set up for that, you can nearly see them putting themSELVES into position more than HHH doing it.

Blade jobs are fairly easy to pull off, unlike michaels when I do a blade job I tend to cut around the hair line instead of the forehead so the hair actually covers the slice and I generally dont go all the way across. The trick to getting a decent amount of blod from a light slice is to hold your breath and force your face to turn red while your down on the mat. That can produce a decent amount of blood or at least enough to sell it to the crowd. When it comes to cutting, you got to be quick about it but you also got to be careful.

As for the scripted matches, I'm sure WWE's are scripted but on the independent circuit everything is done by word of mouth in the ring. Like for example (normally I wouldnt expose this but fuck it, media has already uncovered the secrets behind wrestling) say one guy has another guy in a chin lock, he's trying to make it look good by making strained facial expressions, so while he has the other guy in the chin lock he'll lower his head so his mouth is near the opponents ear and whisper something like "Alright, I'm going to shoot you off the ropes, duck a clothesline, take a back elbow and stay down for a moonsault" or something along those lines. Spots where your close to a wrestler is the best way to get your next moves across. Oh and the referee is also a big help in matches cause you can whisper to him what you wanna do next and he'll relay it to the opponent.

I remember one time during a match I was wrestling a friend and we were face to face "mouthing off" to each other and really we were fucking with the crowd and what we actually said was "Sup man?" - "Not much" - "I'm totally getting smashed tonight" - "Not me, I gotta get up for work tomorrow"

Things like that and it looked like we were just cussing each other out. When the fans are rowdy, they can flood out anything you say.