09-01-2009, 01:56 AM
Jesus. Christ. Is all I have to say. Simply wonderful play on words to describe the surroundings and at the same time I knew how Cain and James felt. I was also linking with Trafford.
There were some areas where you might have missed a word. Like Here:
Possibly meant to use and there?
Other than that it really kept my attention and left me wanting more. Good work.
There were some areas where you might have missed a word. Like Here:
Quote:The trio walked through the city, scoping out the scenery a discovering Mercy-Sei was in fact much larger and more lavish than the first district may've indicated.
Possibly meant to use and there?
Other than that it really kept my attention and left me wanting more. Good work.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
![[Image: Viper-Adjusted-Mini-Sig.png]](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v308/OBLCDiomedes/Viper-Adjusted-Mini-Sig.png)
![[Image: Trixie-Mini-Sig-Fixed.png]](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v308/OBLCDiomedes/Recent%20Signatures/Trixie-Mini-Sig-Fixed.png)
Fighting to the bitter end is an advantage when your opponent does not wish to perish.