[02] Perform for Gamer!

[Cain]

Through pinched lips Cain made the closest thing to trumpet noises he could to the tune of, "We're Off to See the Wizard". Beside him Ander in full tin garb gestured wildly with his hands. "They're not skipping," he said simply. "Or singing," the cyborg pointed out.

"I'll sing if it pleases me!" Orion growled in response. "Err. . . I mean, we're off to see the wizard. . ." he cajoled the last bit, then picked up as the others joined in. Ander, offstage, directed with a thief's acute dexterity with chorus coach crosses in the air.

"The wonderful wizard of Oz!" they finished, Zhu managing a leading skip in place. Orion mimicked the action clumsily, a pained expression on his contenance. When Ander caught Belle's eyes he motioned with a "come on," gesture. The demi-saiyan growled and moved into a half-hearted hop offstage. The cyborg hurriedly drew the curtain, pulling one rope down and throwing the other upward.

"You're not a Broadway cast," Ander said, voice a little hushed. "But you got a few laughs."

"And that's kindof what The Wizard of Oz was about," Cain pointed out.

"Anyway," Ander continued, "This is where you come in Cain. They'll come skipping on from offstage and find you in the cornfield. Remember, you want a brain."

"Right," the cyborg said, perhaps a little too eager to be onstage. He disappeared for a moment and reappeared from backstage with a cardboard cutout of corn. The cyborg strode to center stage, placed the prop behind him, and gave Ander the thumbs up.


The spotlights pierced the cyborg's retinas. He steeled himself against the fright and managed a mock simplicity on his face, vaguely aware of the straw prickling his flesh and poking his scalp beneath a dirty brown, patched hat. He stood as still as stone, arms dangling on hinged elbows, awaiting Dorothy's arrival. The cross-dressing Mr. Zhu skipped out to center stage followed begrudgingly by pepper-hair coated Belle and sun-bleached, orange Orion.

"Where do we go now?" Mr. Zhu asked, looking between the audience and his current companions, voice a fairly honed high-pitch, eyes never quite falling on the cyborg.

Cain hitched his arms to point in the direction they'd just come from and jumped from his still spot before the corn prop. "There's a good way to go," he said.

Contrary to Dorothy's quick and comical backstep Orion leaned toward the cyborg and roared, a resonance that shook the cyborg's innards. "Urgh," the giant of a saiyan said a little softer, his voice still carrying out over the audience with ease. "I mean. Oww, my. . . worms."

Belle turned to the audience and then back to Cain. "Roof," he said simply.

"Don't get goofy Toto," The raven haired Mr. Zhu turned to Belle and said, "Scarecrows can't talk."

The cyborg swayed his arms, straw in the breeze, and pointed in the other direction. "That way's nice too," he said, fighting the urge to scratch his straw-stuffed crotch.

"That's strange," Mr. Zhu said, having remembered this part from the movie. "Wasn't he just pointing that way?" He looked at the audience, milking every minute of the event.

Cain drew both hands together, each pointing over top of the other in opposite directions. "Some people do go both ways," he said, and sprung up, hands held up in an, "I don't know," gesture, his visage a goofy smile and a missmatch of raven hair and straw.

"You don't know much at all," Dorothy-Mr. Zhu said, "Maybe you want to see the uh. . . " he slipped into a normal voice for a second, then slipped back into the high-pitched, high-heeled, almost giddy speech. "the wonderful Wizard of Oz!"

"Hold on darling," Cain said, brushing past the group. "It's time for my close up."

The cyborg preceeded to sing the ever-loving scarecrow theme song. Embarrassingly enough, it was almost in key. If the audience was laughing as he hoped, he couldn't hear it.

"I could wile away the hours
Conferrin' with the flowers
Consultin' with the rain
And my head I'd be scratchin'
While my thoughts were busy hatchin'
If I only had a brain."

While he sung he pantomimed the words, elaborately, over-exuberantly, flitting all around the stage. He tapped his arm where a watch would've been, knelt to speak to the ground, which sprouted a cold, cobalt flower, sung to the sky full of imaginary rain, scratched his head as he wondered about what he'd just done, and in his palms he represented an egg hatching, then tapped the side of his head with a finger as he sang the last bit.

"Er. . ." Mr. Zhu said, and then strangely enough the words came to him too. He sang in the same reedy, high-pitch he talked in, still almost in tune. Ander directed the goofy duo from offstage with an eery tin-man smile.

"With the thoughts you'd be thinkin'
You could be another Lincoln
If you only had a brain."

The cyborg offered his arm and Zhu took it with his own, locking at the elbow. Much to Belle and Orion's dismay The Scarecrow and Dorothy danced about the stage for the last measure. They stared. They almost gawked before Orion felt the yearning to crush Gamer, and straightened, arm on his belly. He mock-bemoaned his worms and Belle, who's arms were hung "puppy-like" before him frowned a killing-frown at Ander.

"Oh, I would tell you why
The ocean's near the shore
I could think of things I never thunk before
And then I'd sit and think some more

I would not be just a nuffin'
My head all full of stuffin'
My heart all full of pain
I would dance and be merry
Life would be a ding-a-derry
If I only had a brain."

They finished up with a rousing round of "We're Off to See the Wizard," Toto and The Brave Lion respectively hopping and skipping morosely as Mr. Zhu offered his arm to Orion several times before he took it. The trio skipped, Orion's massive stride pulling the two offstage as Belle hopped behind. He stopped at the edge of the curtain, head and body just visible.

"Ehm," Belle said, as if preparing to read a legal document. "Roof," he said, and hopped offstage. Ander worked the curtain closed behind them. Back in the dimness of stage left they prepared for the next act.