[BT1-FINAL] Orsalis v Alex T REVIEW

[John Doe]

I had a headache right now, so I'm in no good state of mind to be writing my C&C.

I will say that my vote shall be for Alexander Trafford though. I'll edit in my C&C after I take a nap.

Edit:

Orsalis: There were quite a few times in your posts where I was confused with who exactly you were talking about. For example:

The short, skinny creature was fast, but not faster.

I couldn't tell if you were talking about Alex or Orsalis there. Because of the way you write with Orsalis, the human Alexander could be referred to as a "creature" for sure, though I wouldn't consider 6'1" as "short."

On the positives, I really liked the parts where the narrative meshes with Orsalis' thoughts, specifically the "favored hand" paragraph. I thought you nailed those out of the park. As well, where your first post misstepped, you picked up in your second post. It felt a lot more solid and I couldn't find as many errors.

Alexander Trafford: Where Orsalis' second post went up in quality, I felt your second post was your weaker one, which is unfortunate considering it is the last of the tournament. Your first post had everything I expected from your writing: detailed description and narration, a good feel for both characters, and even some good extended metaphors or similes. I wouldn't say that the second post didn't have all those things, but weren't as frequent or up to snuff as they were before. The final half of your second post's narration felt either rushed or cut off, I assume due to the 1500 word count limit.

Overall, I felt Trafford's writing was more solid than Orsalis' which is why I voted for him.