FoFII: Discussion

[Ashe]

I kinda feel bad about my last post. I wrote too much, and its an experiment failed. Yeah, I made it through this round, but I don't feel that I accelled too much. Looking back now, I had intended to show that Reijin had no fears, but in order to put him into a "nightmare" environment, I thrust him into a world that was the complete opposite of what he is used to. In that world, he held Videl much closer than he normally does, as he hasn't reached that point in reality yet with her. He prides himself on being a Saiyan, and being so strong and powerful. He prides himself on being independant and never having to rely on everyone, and on being able to accomplish anything. He prides himself on his abilities and skills, and for being better than the rest. I made him "just another human", which was what he did not want to be. The entire Videl scene was to show his helplessness that had come from being a human. Meh, I also wanted SSJ2 lol but my point is that I wrote so much that it wasn't clear what I meant. I was originally so proud of myself for taking a different route from everyone, but now I'm wondering if I should have just followed the same cliche path that should have been obvious.

This isn't a sympathy cry either, this is me being critical of myself as a writer. I was aiming so high this round that I guess I overshot, looking back.