Rare Candy Vol. 1

[Violet]

Rare Candy Vol. 1
Calculating Catastrophe Edition
This Issue's Guest Columnist: Warako
May 18, 2008


This Week’s issue is all about the current saga, Calculating Catastrophe! For those of you not familiar with this saga (or those who just are forum trolls, who do nothing shrug and move down to the asylum all the time, <.< You know who you are.) I suggest you check it out. You may find something you like


Are you fucking kidding me?! I am NOT reading all of that!
Luckily for the logophobics out there, I’ve come devised a short version of the saga for you (although, you should feel ashamed of yourself for not reading it yourself.)

SHORT GUIDE
Name: Calculating Catastrophe
Link: Here!
Run by: Bra


Summary:

The discovery began several months ago when a wandering ship deep in space encountered another strange vessel that appeared for all it was, deserted. The desire to pirate the valuable cargo on the ship leads its members into the abandoned craft, a mistake in which they’d never escape from.

Fast forward to the present, and a small corner of the world has erupted in chaos as a mysterious event lay siege to the city. The military has called on Earth’s finest to come battle the scourge that was slowly devouring their city, and damn it if they didn’t come in droves. Fighters from all across the galaxy answered their frantic call, but only time would tell if the battle before them would result in defeat for them, or not.

And so, the invasion began. As the alien infection spread, the Z Senshi find themselves battling something bigger than life, and a hell of a lot more hostile.

I asked our guest columnist, Warako, if he could summarize the saga as best he could. Well...

Warako: kk Vi, here's what happened

Warako: So Vi, the warriors met up at this tower thing, and there was a giant eye at the top and he was in a srz 1 on 1z with this arlian fucker who had on a wizard hat and robe

Warako: Burter was at the bottom of the tower being emo and shit saving some kid and beating up dudez

Warako: The rest on the tower got wtf mind raped with our fearz

Warako: When the eye raped us, the arlian guy raped the eye via skull fuck action and so since the eye died, the tower went boom

Warako: BUT HOLD ON, plot no jutsu can't kill us, so the arlian FROZE TIME and transported everyone to arlia-sei

Warako: But for some unknown magical reason burter and rad end up on some random ass place so they can have some random ass fight than magically return back to arlia-sei

Warako: Now all the cool kids are chillin in the arlia guy time stoppers pad
Warako: But he died during the explosion

Warako: He had the power to stop time, teleport 80 million dudez, but not 1 more

Warako: So anyways, we're chillin in this pad eating his foodz

Violet: You know I'm putting your name on this article
Violet: <.<
Warako: So?
Violet: ok
Violet: just so you know
Violet:
Jack_TheRetiredPornStar: what article
Warako: Put it the way I say it too
Jack_TheRetiredPornStar: FILL ME IN
Jack_TheRetiredPornStar: you fucks

Warako: Anywayz, we're in the homies pad eating his fried chicken
Violet: xD
Warako: But the Arlia guy is like wtf, get out of my house

Warako: So he splits us up into random ass teams

Warako: Which are n't random at all


Jack_TheRetiredPornStar: plot twist!

Warako: So we got Rad and his xtreme cool, a17 and his robotic army gang, and warako's misfits into 3 teams


Warako: We get kicked out of the house and into some random ass infected city, it's the same as earth crap just more advanced

Warako: freeze the story vi
Violet: kk

Warako: Alright well
Warako: We have 3 groups right
Warako: We got Rads who needs to destroy some force field crap for the tower
Warako: Than A17s robotic army has to destroy the suppresion fieldz
Warako: My group has to destroy the satellites
Warako: Now the shit getz XTREME
Violet: man you guys are going to have her so paranoid. x
Violet: xD
Violet: sorry war...go ahead
Warako: So Rad goes wtf bonkers on the infected, but alas the scorpion comes and goes wtf pwnt
Warako: So what do they do?
Warako: Burter steals his girl and fuse rapes and becomes some blue shit

Warako: They go wtf pwnt the scorpion and crap
Warako: Rad is like wtfcookiez but goes on and destroys his force field crap

Warako: A17 and gang destroy the field with no troubles

Warako: My group destroys the satellite easily but paragus got butt raped by the scorpion for trying to solo it
Warako: Now we're all heading to the tower since they just got butt raped for us
Violet: xD i read that one
Warako: But hold on, what's this?

Warako: SARUMAN comes out of the tower and calls back all the infected guys
Warako: They start chanting isengard shit, so now they're defending the tower
Warako: So now we're currently fucking them up and shit going to the tower
Warako: That's it

There you have it, folks, the tl;dr version of Calculating Catastrophe. I want to thank Warako for his rather entertaining summary. Thanks homez.

_____________________________________

Featured Writer

Belle Hibiki

During the course of reading this saga, I’ve picked out a few Chubbsians worthy of mention through their exceptional roleplaying. It was a hard decision, because I felt more than these three deserved attention, but in the end, I had to choose just a few:

http://www.cdbzrpg.com/forum/showpost.ph...tcount=133
http://www.cdbzrpg.com/forum/showpost.ph...tcount=152
http://www.cdbzrpg.com/forum/showpost.ph...tcount=153

So far, throughout the saga, Belle has managed to develop his character into a very likable, albeit eccentric, halfling Saiyan. Now, I read his stuff as the last incarnation of Kid Buu, and never in a million years, have I thought that anything could top such classics as Veni Vidi Vici, which he still vehemently denies is as good as I say it is, but those who have read it know the truth. As Belle, he manages to bring to life a secluded man-boy who has a strange way of going about his life. He’s a hermit, self sufficient, and has a very comedic fear of girls. My favorite post so far has to be this one. It described his fear flawlessly, pushing a bit of comedy in to capture the moment just right.

"HEY GUY. I AM TOTALLY NOT A GUY THAT SCARES GIRLS AWAY. I AM A TOTAL GIRLY MAN."

"I think you mean 'ladies man'."

"What's the difference? Anyway, it feels like - oh. Here they come."

I think this, along with similar dialogue, serves as a perfect example of how naïve Belle can be. I think Kibbs has molded a good character for himself, and this one, I would rate quite comparable to his former avatar. If he doesn’t gain you as a fan with these prime examples, I’ll hunt you down and gauge your eyes out for such blasphemy.

_____________________________________

Honorable Mentions:
Burter - http://www.cdbzrpg.com/forum/showpost.ph...tcount=146
Quite personally, I think Burt just wanted to fuse with 18 just so he could have boobs. That’s just me though. <3 (jk)


Paragus - http://www.cdbzrpg.com/forum/showpost.ph...tcount=151
(May I note, dude, I <3 the oozaru idea. That was kewl)




And last, but not least, a painful, but good natured pat on the shoulder to Bra, who created the saga, and has given a huge effort at making it successful. *slaps back*

_____________________________________

Final Word...


Start READING! I will be basing future reviews off of top rated threads. The rules for this are simple:

-Roleplays nominated must have AT LEAST 3 posts contributing to the overall story with at LEAST 400 words apiece, and be active within the last month. I like em long, but not epic. If it is epic, then it needs to hold my attention.

-Featured writers cannot win again for 3 months.


**CHANGE**

To rate a thread, DON'T rate it directly, please send me a PM with your nomination(s), a brief reason WHY this should be nominated, and a rating:

1-Awful (Obviously, not really expecting this if you're nominating something)
2-Ehh (Its okay, but it could use some work)
3-Enjoyable
4-Awesome
5-Mind Blowing (Will most likely read again.)



The reward is simple: you will get the satisfaction that your writing is being recognized, and gain more readers. =]


If you would like to be a featured columnist, please send me a PM. If I feel that you would suit an upcoming review, I will let you know via PM or AIM.

[Dehan]

I like this idea. Belle's post was really good and had me laughing my ass off, the fusion between Burt and 18 had me on the edge because I frankly thought it wasn't going to happen but hell it did and I was all .

[Violet]

xD Yeah. The first post of him fusing really had me man. Just awesome imagery there. I picked Kibbs mostly from suggestions, and felt that after checking it out, he was worth the feature, even though I wish I could have done Burt and 18 as well. C'est la vie

[Super Buu]

That whole summary was hilarious.

"Warako: Burter steals his girl and fuse rapes and becomes some blue shit"

[Tobias]

ffffffffffffffuck

Belle is nearly how I was going to do Tobias. Particularly girl fear.

Thanks for ruining it asshole. Now I'm going to have to rewrite a bunch.

(you do it better)

[Zangya]

That was fun

And I totally nominates like Violet/Bardock's thread even though i'm not done reading it

I would nominate my thread but it sucks

[Violet]

That was fun

And I totally nominates like Violet/Bardock's thread even though i'm not done reading it

I would nominate my thread but it sucks

I feel it would be wrong to rate my own story, so if that does come to pass, I'll probably let the guest columnist write the article.

By the way, everyone, in about three weeks, which is uh, June 8th, I will be doing the next Rare Candy. Votes will be taken on the 2nd. The theme is the TOP THREE CLASSIC STORY LINES. Roleplays from 12/31/07 and back will be eligible.

To nominate, please send me a PM with a link to the thread, and why you think that this deserves a spot on the top 3.

I will start, also, utilizing the calender and placing the dates and themes of upcoming issues (as well as adding in this issue's feature, and winner) so you all can stay up to date.

REMEMBER TO START RATING THREADS!

My main goal for Rare Candy is to start getting Chubbsians to read their peer's work, and seeing the wonderful response from this, I believe that we all can make this a rich, and more involving community.

[Burter]

As funny as the summary was, you really should have included a real one to go with it.

[Violet]

Made an edit to the main article about rating and nominations. Make sure you read it.

[Violet]

I feel it would be wrong to rate my own story, so if that does come to pass, I'll probably let the guest columnist write the article.

By the way, everyone, in about three weeks, which is uh, June 8th, I will be doing the next Rare Candy. Votes will be taken on the 2nd. The theme is the TOP THREE CLASSIC STORY LINES. Roleplays from 12/31/07 and back will be eligible.

To nominate, please send me a PM with a link to the thread, and why you think that this deserves a spot on the top 3.

I will start, also, utilizing the calender and placing the dates and themes of upcoming issues (as well as adding in this issue's feature, and winner) so you all can stay up to date.

REMEMBER TO START RATING THREADS!

My main goal for Rare Candy is to start getting Chubbsians to read their peer's work, and seeing the wonderful response from this, I believe that we all can make this a rich, and more involving community.

I need your votes by tomorrow night at 11:59 PM, guys. Send em via PM.

[Burter]

Me!

[Violet]

C'mon guys, this thing won't survive without you! I need you to PM me your nominations! I will extend this until WEDNESDAY JUNE 11th, so PLEASE send me your votes!

[Raditzu]

I you'll be better off just picking something yourself.

[Zangya]

you want our votes? you haven't even put up nominations yet.

[Android 17]

She wants ours votes for nominations.

[Violet]

By the way, everyone, in about three weeks, which is uh, June 8th, I will be doing the next Rare Candy. Votes will be taken on the 2nd. The theme is the TOP THREE CLASSIC STORY LINES. Roleplays from 12/31/07 and back will be eligible.

To nominate, please send me a PM with a link to the thread, and why you think that this deserves a spot on the top 3.

Quoted from an above post.