song poem

[Orion]

I wrote this yesterday. It's about how what I'm doing in my life is dissatisfying, and even though I'm working on what I love (music, songs, playing the guitar) the portion of my life that it receives isn't substantial. Plus the fact that a lot of people I know are happy standing around nothing while their life passes them by. That irritates me. Oh, and I'm looking for feedback, good and bad. Please tell me what you think of it, I'll never grow as a writer if you don't.

Anyway, here's "Terranova Drive".

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Like the times on Terranova Drive
Unquestioning, deliberate to no one
I speak ahead of my time
Beyond the footsteps of the setting sun
The silence of days and nights
Breaks windows, sharp and hopeless
Scar these dreams

Be there
For old time's sake
See me there
For old time's sake
Memories make
For old time's sake

When it all rested in my hand
The wind sweeps us
Into the gutter, choosing and
Waiting till we breathe in dust
Knowledge of ages past, flickering words
Said false by experience

Be there
For old time's sake
Or this will start the shower

Be there
For old time's sake
See me there
For old time's sake
Memories make
For old time's sake

It's funny how it all fades
It's stupid how you don't crave

Scratch the surface with ink
Close the mind to set it free

Do you care
For old time's sake?
Would you dare
For old time's sake?
Breathe my air
For old time's sake

Maybe it was my mistake.

[Kami]

Not bad.