04-07-2011, 01:13 AM
Mal: You seemed to give up on your own writing as you were writing it. The quality is getting better, but I feel you just needed a bit more detailing on the actual fight. You'll get there eventually. Now C&C some shit.
Belle: These posts were smoother in transition than your last couple and I like how you tied in previous encounters with Mal's characters. I couldn't find time to read the entire second post, but I'll get around to that as you have a good grip on your character perspective.
Belle.
Belle: These posts were smoother in transition than your last couple and I like how you tied in previous encounters with Mal's characters. I couldn't find time to read the entire second post, but I'll get around to that as you have a good grip on your character perspective.
Belle.